Interpersonal Relationships and Critical Conversation

Dear Editor,

Your relationships will be few, if you wait for everyone to come to you. 

More and more people are living in isolation. Their world is their telephone. Their friends are on their phones. Their church experiences are on their phones. Their recreation is on their phones. 

Most all of us spend more time on a cellphone than we ever dreamed of doing. I for one do a lot of my vocational work on my cellphone, so I look at my phone as much as anyone. However, man cannot live by phone alone. There has to be more to life than a cellphone, tablet or computer. There is a world out there. There are people who live in the world who are just like you. They crave connections and relationships. Most are finding them on their cellphones through social media or various Internet sites.

The sad reality of this is that people aren’t really connecting to other people. Cellphone or social media communication is typically very surface communication. We aren’t really sharing that much about ourselves nor understanding that much about what others are doing or going through. Usually, we have perceptions that are not completely accurate. 

Interpersonal communication is critical to the mental and spiritual health of our planet. We need communication and real in-person talking. Telephone conversations are critical but personal visits, when possible, are even better.

Political leaders must sit down at the table and talk. The government cannot accomplish anything without verbal one-on-one exchanges or at least small group dialogues. 

Family gatherings are critical. People need to feel connected to family. Your family may be small, but you need each other and love must always be the priority. How many terrorist shooters might have been saved from their heinous acts if family and possibly a couple of friends could have had real connections to those people?

As parents, we often back off too much. We give too much freedom and too much space. We need to stay right in the middle of our children’s lives as much as we possibly can. This means keeping the conversations going. We have to continue to care about what they are doing, where they are going and what is going on in their lives. This becomes very difficult as children grow up and don’t want their parents in their business.  

Keep in mind that you are still a mom or a dad. You can’t treat your 21-year-old like they are ten, but you can still keep reaching out, expressing love, giving encouragement and embracing them emotionally. Of course, even then, some children grow up to choose destructive lifestyles or make horrific life decisions.  People have minds of their own.  Yet, if parents and family members keep reaching out to each other it might just be enough to keep a loved one on a good path and living a good life.

You and your family to orchestrate and implement this dire initiative. 

Dr. Glenn Mollette