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Do you compliment your mate?

letter to the editor

Dear Editor,

Where do you hear a compliment? Dolly Parton said her husband was receiving a number of compliments from a woman at their local bank. She subsequently wrote the song titled Jolene.  In the song she penned these words, “Jolene, please don’t take my man just because you can.” I don’t believe for a minute there was ever any woman who could have snatched up Carl Dean away from Dolly. However, whatever was transpiring made for a great hit song for Dolly. Also, I feel confident that Carl was getting plenty of attention from Dolly at home as well. Or, maybe he wasn’t, who knows? 

A counselor asked a man if he woke up grumpy? He replied, “No, I just let her sleep.”

Where does your husband or wife receive their compliments, admiration and affirmation? Do they receive it at home or from someone at the bank, the grocery store, Walmart, church, gym or neighbor?  We all like a good word. It’s nice to hear we look good, or that we are appreciated, admired or whatever the praise might be. We all like to hear a good word. Most everyone deserves a good word unless you are the Devil. Even he can garner some positive words. He is a hard worker and extremely successful would certainly be in order. 

My main point here is that spouses, significant others, should daily hear a good word at home and from each other. Tell your wife she is beautiful, pretty, gorgeous, incredible and more every day. Tell your husband he is handsome, good looking, incredible or something like that every day. If she or he is not then why did you marry them and why do you stay with that woman or man? 

Most likely you told your wife often years ago that she was pretty, special, awesome and more when you first met and married. Or, you may have said similar meaningful words to your husband. Have you stopped? When was the last time you really connected with your spouse 

between his or her ears? Maybe you got discouraged and gave up because it wasn’t reciprocal.

Too often and so many times I have heard couples cut each other down to the core. Every word was negative about the other. Criticism toward the other was abundant. Sadly, these couples never ever sweetened up toward each other. This is so sad for such couples. In most of these scenarios these couples eventually sought others to hear a good word. 

Regardless if you have been with your mate for ten days or 50 years there should be a good word toward the other every day. “I appreciate you. You make my life better. You are still handsome, beautiful, etc.” 

Don’t take your mate for granted. We all do to some extent, but life is short. On some level, when she or he is gone you miss that person. 

If you seriously think it’s beneath you to change your ways and uplift your spouse daily then you need to examine yourself, your heart and your relationship. Don’t spend your life with someone you can’t cherish, admire and love. Maybe your spouse isn’t as gorgeous or handsome after 30 years. Our bodies change, but beauty and love are deeper than skin. 

Think about it. We can all do better. 

Dr. Glenn Mollette

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