It’s easy to declare that previous generations had better manners and values as Jack Hommel wrote about. But this nostalgic view ignores a fundamental truth: economic stress shapes human behavior, and today’s generation faces financial pressures that would have been unimaginable to their predecessors.
The numbers don’t lie. Consider the stark reality facing young adults today. In 1980, the median home price was roughly 3.7 times the median household income. Today, that ratio has ballooned to over 7 times in many markets. A generation that could once buy a home on a single income now finds two-income households priced out entirely.
Grocery bills that once represented a manageable budget portion now consume an ever-growing share of take-home pay. Student loan debt, virtually non-existent for many baby boomers, now saddles graduates with mortgage-sized payments before careers even begin. Healthcare costs, childcare expenses, and basic necessities have all outpaced wage growth by significant margins.
The result is a generation working longer hours for relatively less purchasing power, often juggling multiple jobs just to maintain what previous generations considered a basic standard of living.
Survival mode is becoming the norm. Financial stress affects every aspect of life. The parent rushing through the grocery store might seem rude, but they could be calculating their remaining credit while mentally preparing for their second job shift. People are completely stressed out these days. The young adult glued to their phone might be managing gig work schedules or handling the complex logistics of a life where financial stability requires constant hustle.
What reads as poor manners might actually be the visible signs of someone in economic survival mode.
Previous generations often had economic predictability. A high school diploma could lead to stable, well-paying work. A college degree was an almost guaranteed path to middle-class prosperity. Pensions provided retirement security. Healthcare was standard employer coverage.
This financial stability created space for social niceties we associate with “better manners.”
The people of yesterday were able to purchase a house with pennies. When you’re not worried about making rent, you have mental bandwidth for pleasantries. When basic needs are secure, you can afford patience with others. When you’re not exhausted from multiple jobs, you have energy for courtesy.
Dismissing an entire generation’s behavior as moral failing ignores the systemic changes that have reshaped American life. Today’s young adults aren’t inherently less respectful than their predecessors. They’re responding to economic pressures that would challenge anyone’s ability to maintain social graces.
Economic hardship erodes the social fabric that makes communities strong. When parents work longer hours for less buying power, they have less time for community involvement. When young people must move frequently for work or can’t afford to stay in their hometown, they lose stable social networks that reinforce positive behavior.
Instead of lamenting lost courtesy, perhaps we should ask why a generation is so stressed that basic politeness feels like an unaffordable luxury. Instead of attributing behavioral changes to moral decline, we might consider how economic conditions make it harder for people to be their best selves.
This isn’t to excuse inappropriate behavior or suggest economic stress justifies rudeness. Rather, it’s a call for understanding the context of today’s social interactions. When we see troubling behavior, we might ask not just “Why are people so rude?” but “What conditions are creating this stress?”
The generation facing criticism today didn’t choose to enter a world where basic financial security requires extraordinary effort. They’re adapting to circumstances largely beyond their control, maintaining dignity while navigating unprecedented economic challenges.
Perhaps instead of judging their manners, we should admire their resilience. Instead of comparing them to a past that may never have been as golden as memory suggests, we might work toward a future where financial security provides the foundation for the kind of society we all want.
The measure of a generation isn’t whether they maintain perfect manners while drowning—it’s whether they find ways to help each other stay afloat.
So, sorry people are so rude today but they don’t have it as good as the spoiled.
Donna Ramirez
Miss Ramirez has written a well-crafted letter of rebuttal regarding Jack Hommel’s remarks on basic manners becoming a lost practice. However, my concern is that she has given us a fallacy in argument using a faulty analogy.
While financial pressures are a real dynamic for many young people and these can lead to less polite behaviors, it seems a gross generalization to say that this singular issue should give the decline in societal mannerliness a pass.
Furthermore, an end-justifies-the-means argument also fails in the systemic problem of poor conduct. “The measure of a generation isn’t whether they maintain perfect manners while drowning—it’s whether they find ways to help each other stay afloat.”
If survival by any means is to be the norm, then society, writ large, will soon cease to be society at all.
To be sure, with two incomes needed for most households it is taxing for parents to govern and teach proper etiquette. It is, however, a manageable task if it is a priority and a core value.
It goes beyond the home and family as well.
Teachers, mentors, coaches, and a host of others have a responsibility to ensure that conduct that is becoming of good character is reinforced, and this does not directly correlate to financial pressures.
Anecdotally, when I was younger, if I misbehaved in public I heard about it from neighbors and then from my parents at home. Almost universally, communities used to share in a sense of right and wrong behavior or manners.
Today, try correcting any form of impoliteness by a child and expect a strong rebuke by the parents not toward the child, but toward you.
I am not discounting the true remarks that middle-class life is less and less attainable due to financial stress and spending power; I am simply saying it is not the primary reason for impoliteness.
Miss Ramirez does identify one possible consideration when dealing with rudeness. Everyone has struggles and financial ones can contribute to one being brusque.
Still, a deeper dive into the root causes of a loss of mannerliness is needed rather than drawing a faulty analogy or over generalization.